CHAPTER FORTY


"We're going where?" Taryn exclaimed the next morning. Shrill.
"I think it's ballsy, but I think it's smart." Tray added his piece. "It's a good idea."
"No! No, it's not! Are you a moron? Am I the only one who's not a moron here?" Taryn whirled around the group. "Maya? Some words of wisdom from the genius child would be helpful!"
I took a breath. It's all I could do. Taryn was a force to be had, but she was the only one speaking the language of logic, but…Jace wouldn't lead us to a nest of hornets if he didn't have a reason and my reason…Marcus was there. It was a sick thrill, but I wanted to watch his back as he tried to find mine.
"It's where we have to go." I murmured.
"Taryn, what's your issue? It's not about you." Jace spoke up.
Rafe had been banished to the patio, but she watched with amusement through the kitchen window. We weren't taking any chance with a snitch in the household, but she was still enjoying the obvious show.
"My neck's on the line. This is for sure, damn, about me." Taryn argued. "Tray? No words? You have nothing?"
And the boyfriend ignored his lover when he offered, "We could stay at Austin's."
"No! We're not staying at my brother's! He's a child." Taryn nearly shrieked.
"He's nineteen and he's not a child, Taryn. He's had to deal with your parent's divorce, you and Mandy leaving. Plus, that stuff at his school. He can handle it, hell—he might not even realize that we're there. It's perfect."
"He has a house?" Jace asked, serious.
"No! No! NO! We're not considering this. I am not endangering my brother."
"Austin's smart. He can take care of himself." Tray turned to Jace, "I'll call him right now. He's got two roommates, but he'll figure something out."
"No. You are not calling my baby brother." Taryn reached for his phone.
Tray easily evaded her and left the room.
Taryn cursed.
"That would be perfect, Taryn." Jace commented.
"Oh, now you're talking to me, are you?! Too late, buddy." Taryn proclaimed, heatedly, and stomped from the room.
Which left Jace and myself. I glanced to him and asked, "What'd she mean by that?"
"Nothing." Jace clipped out.
I arched my own eyebrow.
Jace crumbled, "She's hurt by something I said the other night. It's going to take some time for her to…"
"Get over it?" I asked, tongue in cheek.
"Something like that Yeah." He ran a hand through his hair and turned for the coffee pot. "You want some more?"
"Are we driving to Pedlam?"
"No. I called in some favors. We've got a jet that's going to take us. We just don't have time to drive anymore." And Jace tensed when Taryn hurled back into the kitchen. She advanced, angrily, and seethed, "If you hurt my baby brother, I will ruin you. Got it?"
Tray followed right behind and smiled, "He's all for it. He said come when we're 'chilled.'"
Taryn snorted, fought a grin, and lifted another promising finger to Jace before she turned and left—again.
Tray waited until we heard her slam their bedroom door and then commented, "Is this going to risk him? Because if it, I'll need to tell him to head out. Austin's not to be harmed by this business."
"No." Jace shook his head. "They won't see us coming and they definitely won't think to check Taryn's nineteen year old little brother. He has his own house?"
"Yeah. He moved out when Taryn and Mandy left for college. The house isn't deeded to him. I think one of his friends' dad owned it and is selling it, payment by payment to Austin."
"It's not in his name, then?" Jace wanted to make sure.
"No. It's not in his name."
"Good. Then they won't find it. We're hidden." Jace grimly nodded. "What about his roommates?"
And Tray smiled, a genuine, honest to goodness, smile when he informed us, "Austin said he'd take care of it."
And he did.
Two hours later we were greeted with the sight of tall, lean, and a slacker's wit that was packed with a 'let's all go to hell together because I don't give a shit what you think' attitude that matched the intelligence in his green eyes.
"Hey, all. Newbies. Oldies. Wicked sisters." Austin twinkled as he reached over and flicked Taryn's shoulder.
Pissed, but unable to contain her joy at seeing him, Taryn shoved him and then hugged him. Something was whispered, but Austin laughed and told Tray, over Taryn's shoulder, "I kicked 'em out—at least for a few weeks. I'd had enough of 'em. They can come back, maybe, in a month."
Tray chuckled, hugged him, and asked, "How'd they handle that?"
Austin shrugged and ran a lazy hand through his shaggy mop of rich brown curls, "They were playing Playstation and I unplugged it, told 'em to get out, and they did."
Taryn looked proud, but her brother rolled his eyes. "Get over it, sis. I get my prowess from the other mom."
"Fuck you." But she laughed. "I'm not your mom."
"You act like it 110 percent of the time when Mandy's not calling to see if I have enough Kleenex for all my 30 colds a year—that I never have." Austin remarked, but threw his hand towards Jace, "So you're Lanser, huh?"
"I am." Jace was studying him intently, but that's all he said.
"I know who you are." And that was all he said.
Jace hide a grin, but I saw it was there.
And then Austin turned towards me and stopped in his tracks.
Shock, lust, and a wolf whistle rolled off him like a hot summer's sweat. Smooth and just there.
"Hi, I'm Austin." Austin stepped close, his arms out for a hug, but Taryn stepped in, grabbed his arm and wrenched him to follow her inside.
"She's not available." She told him, instantly.
"She's hot." Austin was heard, just inside as the door slammed behind them. "Hotness like that is never unavailable. It's a sin to man's…" And his voice faded from hearing distance.
Tray grinned and murmured, "Most of that was just to get Taryn riled up. He's a master, but don't worry—the kid's solid. He's got Taryn wrapped around his pinkie, which is no easy feat."
As he moved to follow inside, Jace held me back with a finger hooked in my backpocket.
"He's a kid." I laughed, misunderstanding.
Jace shook his head. "He's not a kid and you're only two years older, but that's not what this is about."
I waited when I saw the gravity of his eyes. "What?"
"Have you thought about where Marcus might be keeping the Key?"
"What? Munsinger's still missing. I can't—"
"I need you to." Jace stopped me. Somber. "let me focus on Munsinger and you focus on the Key. Think about the Father theme. We need to get ahead of him. You were right, what you said in the car the other day. Mallon is probably just holding him, thinking that we'll only be focused on him, but we can't. We have to get ahead and we need that book."
"Okay. I'll work on it."
"What can I do to help you?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. I probably—I need some time away, alone."
"Where?"
"I don't know." I laughed. "I'll think of somewhere."
"A park? A place like that?"
"Jace." I reassured him, with a hand to his heart, "I want this done just as much as you. I'll know where I need to go or when I need to go. I promise."
"We're not even close to being done." Jace remarked, quietly, as I turned and walked inside.
Inside, we were greeted with laughter and a shriek of, "We're not ordering pizza and drinking beer tonight."
"Why not?" The nineteen year old argued, "What? Or am I the only one who drinks?"
"Austin." Taryn laughed. "Shut up."
It was good to hear. Taryn's happiness overshadowed everything else. It was almost as if…something felt right for one of us, so that extended to all of us. That we could breathe, just a little bit, after we still hadn't felt the ramifications of our escaped battle.
Tray spoke up as he saw us, "Hey, you guys got the room over there." He nodded behind us. There was a small door that led out from the kitchen as the kitchen was connected to three doorways. One led to the living room. The second led to our bedroom. And the third led into a tight foyer, which enfolded to a back door that led outside and to the stairs the led upstairs.
"Where are you staying?" Jace asked.
"We've got the room upstairs."
Jace turned towards Austin.
"I'm—huh—," He coughed to clear his throat and laughter, "I'm downstairs, but it's an old house. Basement's connected outside, its got it's own stairs, so you might hear the back door opening at night. Sorry, ahead of time, because it squeaks. It's an old house."
Jace nodded, "It's a good house. A sturdy foundation."
"I know." Austin nodded, confident and cocksure.
He was a breath of fresh air.
Austin caught the faint grin that flashed over my lips and curled his own in an inviting manner, "Yeah, huh?" He winked.
Taryn punched him in the stomach.
"Just kidding, sis. You're always rolled so tight." Austin taunted as he strolled to the freezer and grabbed some beer from inside. "I threw these in there. Dick resupplied the stock this morning, but he's too lazy to throw them in the fridge. Should be cold by now, the dickhead."
"Resupplied?" Taryn asked stiffly. She hadn't opened her bottle.
Austin did it for her and nodded, "Yep, mother. We drank the rest last night and it was Dick's turn for the market."
Jace's phone rang and he took it in our bedroom.
Austin took the opportunity and strolled to my side where he propped his arm high on a shelf above me. Seduction rolled off of his handsome good looks as he winked and murmured, "What's your name again?"
Taryn grabbed him by the ear and hauled him upstairs.
"What? Ow! That hurts." Austin grumbled, but let his sister lead him away.
Tray chuckled in their aftermath, but sobered as he caught my somber amusement.
He coughed and said, "Lanser wanted her to have a better life. That's part of that better life." He indicated upstairs.
I saw that it was. I saw the love. I saw the protection. And I saw the adoration a little brother or sister would naturally, and should, have for their older, sometimes not wiser, sibling.
"I get that. I do." I murmured.
I'd wanted that with Krein. I'd wanted it so badly that I'd followed him to another life. Another world. And this world was much uglier, but I never questioned if it was real or not. This world was reality. It wasn't subjective or objective. It just was.
I never considered myself unlucky to have stumbled upon it.
"Taryn's folks split awhile back, but Austin watched all of it. He had Taryn's attitude before she moved in, but I think she magnified it tenfold. He needed it. He needed someone to stand up to them. I think, in some ways, Taryn saved Austin. He moved out and he's been on his own ever since."
A nineteen year old, living on his own since he was fifteen. Why did that sound so familiar?
"I've known my share of runaways." I murmured. "And he's not one of them. He's lucky."
"He has Taryn and Mandy. They mother him, but he loves it."
"He deserves it."
"Yeah. He does." Tray nodded.
"It's distracting, you know." I murmured, softly and to myself. I moved to watch out the window as I saw the world pass by, their lives a regular basis.
"What is?"
"This. You. Taryn. That." I glanced upstairs. "It's distracting and yet, a part of me can't distract myself forever."
"From what?" Tray asked.
And I looked to my bedroom, where I heard Jace's muffled monotone voice answer briskly, "From that."
"What's that?" Tray asked, quietly, intently.
"He's conquered a world that is harsh, ugly, and familiar terrain. I'll never leave it. I can't. I've seen some awful horrible things and our little attack wasn't one of them. But Jace—he's seen evil up front and in person. I've seen evil. I've touched evil, but not like Jace. Jace had to live evil for six years and he had to keep his soul. My fight wasn't like that. And…"
"And…" Tray supplied.
"And here it is." I whirled to him, threw out my arms, and bared my soul for his revenge, "I used you. I used Taryn. I used Carter, but I did it because I…I don't fully know why. If I said that I had a mission, that's too lame for me to even utter the words. Jace thinks I was manipulated, and maybe I was, but…it doesn't fit right. I don't manipulate that easily, and yet…I can't say why I had to find him except that I had to. I don't know why, but maybe…maybe one day, I will."
Tray didn't make a comment.
"Seeing Taryn with her brother, knowing that she has history with Jace, that's still there and between them—I don't know. For some reason it makes me wonder…what is this all about?"
"I have to admit." Tray grinned brokenly. "Your realness is a little…weird."
"Unsettling?"
"Yeah."
"Good, because I've been unsettled this entire time. I wasn't always like this. I was…good. I had everything set. Marcus knew nothing of my other life. I was safe. I had a house to live in. I had a nephew to play with and…then I visited my brother and we certainly don't have that relationship." I pointed upwards. "I don't pull him by the ear. I don't reprimand him for drinking underage. I don't…I can't save him anymore. I can't…that's never been in my relationship with him."
"Me neither." Tray relented on a weary breath. He rolled his eyes and moved to lean beside me. The wall held us both up now.
"I know. I met your brother." I said lightly.
"It's weird." Tray spoke.
"What is?"
"We don't have what they have, yet—we see it and we appreciate it when they don't. It's weird. It makes me wonder…what do I have that I can't see?"
"Life." I answered easily. "Two legs. Good looks. Taryn."
"Smarts." Tray grinned, cockily.
"Cockiness." I countered swiftly.
"Humbleness." Tray laughed now.
"Balls." I deadpanned. And Tray laughed harder.
It took a moment, but my grin quirked it's escape.
The door wrenched open, Jace stared grimly to our laughing eyes, and the relief fled from the room.
I heard it's distant door slam shut.
And Taryn's door slammed shut as she pounded down the stairs, to burst through the door, and proclaim, "That kid is grounded. I grounded him and can I not be more lame?!"
"Let's go." Jace said quietly.
"Go?" I asked.
"Go!?" Taryn exclaimed. "Where? We're hiding."
"You're hiding. We're working." Jace said pointedly and lightly touched my elbow. "Let's go." He nodded out the door.
"But…" Taryn faltered.
"We'll be back." Jace murmured, lightly placed a hand at the small of my back, and moved behind as we left for the car.
"Where are we going? What was your phone call about?"
Jace didn't put the keys to the slot, but sat still, with the keys dangling in his lap.
"Jace." I said again, softly.
He reached for a breath and let it unfold.
"Jace." I said again. Still softly.
"I need to…I need to take you somewhere, somewhere that…" He finally looked up, saw me, and tore down another wall among the so many that were between us.
"Somewhere what?" I asked, my chest tight. Just waiting for something…something that I had started to admit to Tray, but couldn't put it in words.
"You like that kid in there?" Jace mentioned. He gestured towards the house.
"Austin?"
"Yeah. You like him?"
"He's…entertaining, I guess. He…why?"
"Just…do you? Like him?"
I shrugged, "Yeah. How could I not? He's got Taryn whipped."
"That's what you can still have." Jace said now, clear as day and with a purpose in his voice.
"I know…" I let my voice falter. I didn't want what was coming, but I knew that I couldn't take the exit door.
"Krein's not that bad. He's…stupid, in some ways, but…he's not evil. You can still make him be what you need, your family. You can still have that."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I have to. Because I have to…I have to warn you before I show you what I need to show you. Because…"
"I'm not taking the easy way out."
"It's not an easy way out." Jace countered, swiftly, hoarse. "It's the truth. You're just one person, Maya. I want you with me on this, but…you came to me seeking answers to why Krein turned out to be how he did. I know that. I know that, deep down, you just want a family and he's your best shot. Your mom was never really there, was she?"
She wasn't, but that wasn't the point.
"So it was Krein." Jace surmised correctly. "He was your family and that's all you really wanted. You came to me because you wanted to understand what happened to him, but…nothing happened to your brother. He was just…lost and guilty."
I choked down my abandoned dreams and asked, stricken, "What did you want to show me?"
"I can tell you how to save your brother's soul. Do you want to know?" Jace whispered and waited.
"Is that what you want? For me to know what I came to you for and to leave? Is this where we end?" I asked back, hollow.
"It could be." Jace said simply.
"Maybe. Maybe I did come to you, thinking in some far-fetched part of me that you could tell me how to save my brother, how to make him right again, but…that isn't what this is about. You're giving me a way out." I waited, saw his jaw tightened, and added, "You are, aren't you? You're giving me a way out."
"Do you want it? That's the question, Maya." Jace whispered and my heart broke as I saw a lone tear fall from his eyelids. He gazed at me, strongly, and still brokenly.
"What are you going to show me?"
"Something that'll—you won't be able to go back. You won't get this window again because you won't want it."
"So you're asking if I choose naivety over the truth?" I asked, my throat tight with emotion. "How can you ask that of me?"
"Because I…" Jace faltered, self-conscious. It was the only time I'd ever seen this alien side of him, but I knew instantly. I realized that I was knowing him instantly.
"Because what?"
"Because I…"
The sun shone bright, right then and there. It illuminated his nakedness and my breath was stolen. I saw the trees again, and wondered in a faint corner of my mind, why they stood how they did and why they seemed to always be knowing.
They seemed iridescent and I was loathe to admit how uncomfortably that feeling rode accustomed to my soul.
"What are you saying?" I asked.
Jace took a breath, reached for the keys, and stated, clearly, "You're in or out. Here and now. This is your only chance."
A moment passed as he held my gaze.
I thought about. I thought about his words. That I could get what Taryn had with Austin, but I looked in Jace's eyes and I knew that he had a truth I needed to hear.
He had a purpose that drove him and it was with one decision that stood between us. He offered me an out, I could take it, but I looked at him and knew my soul wouldn't allow it.
I reached over and turned the key's in the engine.
As the engine purred to life, that was my answer.
And Jace let another tear fall before he pulled it into drive and off we went.
For a destiny that I only felt, but didn't understand.
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