CHAPTER FOURTEEN


"What's this about?" I asked coolly, but I'd already figured it out.


He knew that, but he played anyway.


Jace flashed a cocky grin when he commented, "This is our narc."


"What's it to do with me?"


Jace made a tsking sound as he shook his head slowly. "He sent men after you
too, Maya. Men that shot at you. And he played you."


Yes. Jace knew the right buttons.


I ignored the stirring of irritation and cocked my head to the side, "So? He
wouldn't be the first that tried."


"But he succeeded." Jace said smoothly. "I bet he had you fooled. He gave you
a heart-to-heart, probably about me—"


"Poor Jace." I mocked. This was an all-out battle. And it was still about our
wills. It was either my way or his way, no compromise. I held nothing back in my
contempt, "Such a good little saint. You survived the lion's den, didn't you?
You survived and everyone sits back and wonders how awful those years must've
been for you. Lying to your best friend? Watching them snort their latest trick
and you secretly despised them the whole time?"


My eyes fell flat when I stated, "I wonder how much of it was a show for you
and how much of it was a ride that you went along and you just managed to
remember where your stop was?"


Oscar glanced between us, but I stared steadily at Jace.


My fate depended upon it.


Jace smirked and said coldly, "If we're talking sad tales, let's not leave
you out, Maya. You loved your brother—you worshiped him and he threw you to the
curb."


"That's not harsh."


"It is when you think about it." Jace smiled easily. "You left everything.
You left your mom, your nice comfy bed, all your little friends and ponies…you
left it all for your brother and he turned his back on you. That's cold
rejection like I've never heard of. Krein did that to you, but you didn't go
back to momma dearest. Oh no, you stayed put. You pined for a brother's love
like someone would pine for their lover's touch. You're emotionally stunted
because you haven't even progressed to that lover's touch. You're still back in
square one, wondering why big brother doesn't love you."


"Do you lay awake at night and think about her?" My rage was blistering. It
recognized no limit. "You loved her for how many years?"


We both knew who.


I continued, acid dripped from my words, "She loved your brother all that
time. She was with him. Didn't you ever stop and wonder about it? If she really
loved you, why she never did anything about it. Maybe she loved you, but she
just didn't love you enough to do something about it. The ache just didn't burn
hard enough inside of her and she was content with your brother's touch. And
now…" I mocked and felt my soul strip away, just slightly. "she's got her new
lover. She's felt his touch for almost five years. Do you think about them?
About when he's inside of her and she gasps his name? Do you ever fantasize
that's it your name she gasps? And that you're the one touching her, thrusting
inside of her?"


"What was it like?" Jace threw back. Neither of us moved, but we fought in a
slow taunting circle. "When Mallon put his prick in you? How long were you in
his bed? How long did you prostitute yourself for him? What were you doing it
for? Were you trying to get as close to your brother's world as possible? Now
he's looking for you and I'm betting it's either because you know something on
him or because he loves you. What's it like? To know that a psychopath loves you
and it's your fault? What'd you have to whisper back to him to make him worship
you? What's that feel like? To know what you did pumped blood into a cold man's
heart—and you did it knowing what you were doing."


"You want to throw stones?" I murmured.


Jace smiled tightly and threw back, "We've thrown more than stones, Maya.
Just admit it."


"Fine." I clenched my jaw. "How's that guilt feel?"


Jace clenched his jaw and waited, readied.


"You must have a truckload of it to ship your brother out from his peaceful
grave to one where you can visit because you owe him. You owe a dead piece of
metal. Your brother doesn't care, he's dead. No, that guilt that's inside of
you—it must just eat you alive. And you've had it gnawing at the bone for five
years now. He died because of you."


His eyes burned.


I continued, uncaring, "He died because of you, because of your world and
what you had done. It's your fault that your brother's dead. How does that
feel?"


"Is this how you want to ingratiate yourself with me?" Jace asked
scornfully.


"No." I moved forward and lightly rested my hands on my hips. "I give as good
as I get and I need you. I will make you burn with hatred if I have to, but the
truth is—I have the balls to bring her here. And I have the balls to make sure
she's placed right in the line of fire if that's what it takes."


Jace watched me in the filtered moonlight that blinked through the wooded
trees. Both of stood there, studying and weighing the next reaction.


My tendons wanted to snap, but my bones were cemented in glue at that moment.
It was now or never and I needed to win this battle. I'd be a casualty of the
war if this fight was lost.


Swiftly, Jace reached behind him and withdrew his 9mm. He flipped it in his
hands and held the handle towards me.


"Fine. You want me to help you, then you gotta earn it." He said
smoothly.


My mouth went dry, but I reached for the gun with a steady hand.


It had been strapped against his back, but the metal was cool to the touch.
Any warmth that might've resided from his back, depleted immediately against the
cool chill of the air as it was passed between us. It was heavy and my hand
nearly dropped from the sudden weight, but my fingers closed tightly and I kept
my arm straight.


I waited.


Jace turned and kicked at the paralyzed Oscar. He grabbed his shirt and
yanked him so he was right in front of me. He lay at my feet.


Jace backed away two steps and said silkily, "I don't like narcs and I don't
like loose ends."


My eyelids flickered up and I stared at him, boldly.


I saw a pool of cold lust in his depths, but what lay before it was a
ruthlessness that I'd never met before.


Jace ordered briskly, "Find out who he called and finish it."


"Is that what you did with my brother? You made him prove his worth to you?
Is that how he sold his soul to the devil, because he teamed up with you?"


Jace laughed and the sound glittered in the night, "Oh…you do have big
brother issues, don't you?"


My jaw hardened.


"It's not going to work." Jace commented. "You're not going to get a rise out
of me. I gave you an ultimatum. Now choose."


I gazed at Oscar. I remembered his words to me, that I was on a fool's
errand. I'd come to like him over the month and thought he was a man of
substance.


And now I was being forced. My brother's life or this gravedigger's life.


"Who did you call?" I asked softly.


He was sure of his death, but there was a small amount of fear in his eyes.
Oscar glanced quickly to Jace and I thought I saw a plead in them, but I wasn't
sure because it was gone just as quick and he looked back at me, grave.


I stepped over him and lowered the gun so the barrel pointed straight at his
chest. "Who did you call?" I asked louder, my voice steady.


Oscar pushed himself up to an elbow and sat with an arm draped over his
knees. He looked at me as if a soldier glimpsing his first ray of death over the
horizon. He was ready and he wasn't regretful.


"What's this about, PrettyGirl? Why you listening to him?" He sniffed, "I
thought you wasn't no snake."


I cocked the gun, ready to fire when I said hoarsely, "I'm not no snake, but
I can act like one, if need be."


Oscar measured Jace for a moment and then turned back to me, "So that's the
boy you were waiting for. I expected him to be taller."


Jace didn't react, no comment, no bristling of movement. Nothing.


"Who did you call, Oscar?"


He shook his head, as if pitying me, "Is this going to 'complete' you? You
searching for completion and now you're standing at that end of the gun. This
ain't going to complete you. I may be old and can still get riled up by
Abagail's backside, but I know this much. Ending life—that's a fools run."


I glanced to Jace and saw that he just watched. And measured.


I knew what I needed to do, but I was still loathe to do it. I swallowed it
down and reached for my blade. The metal's casing flashed as it caught the
moonlight's reflection as I flipped it open and deftly caught it in my hand. I
moved in another flash and embedded it firmly through the thick bulge of muscle
in Oscar's calve muscle.


He choked down the scream and his eyes widened from the restraint it took to
kill that scream of pain. Growls of pain muffled from his closed throat as he
fell to the ground and grabbed at his leg.


"Who did you call?"


I wouldn't give any more information and I wouldn't allow any more
stalling.


"I didn't call no one." Oscar grunted through clenched lips as he still
writhed on the ground.


I squatted before him, but out of reach and said grimly, "This isn't about me
and my search of completion. Right now, I need to know who you called and if I
don't get that information, then you can expect Abagail to be next to you in a
moment. I'm willing to go that route if I have to."


The reaction came then as he bared his teeth at me. It spewed it's hatred as
the snake at my feet now hissed it's ugly head at me in a language that I'd
never heard.


Jace stepped forwards and kicked him in the head, "Stop muttering that
witchcraft."


Oscar's head whipped back from the force of Jace's foot, but he quieted.


Jace took my gun and grasped Oscar's shoulder in a hold that prodded points
of the body that held mystery to me.


Oscar screamed as Jace's fingers cut into him.


Jace said coldly, "Who'd you call, Witch?"


Oscar shook his head, now blind from the pain, and he started to mumble his
secret language that sent chills down my back.


"Maya." Jace commanded as he stared at Oscar, "Start back to the car."


I faltered, but as he sent a withering glare my way, I started to run. I'd
stumble far enough where the moonlight had ceased to light my way and I couldn't
hear Oscar's cries in pain. I remembered Jace's instructions on how to walk and
I concentrated to keep my footing right.


As I continued, not fully sure if I'd gone the right direction, I
half-listened to hear a blood-curdling scream to fill the night behind me. As
another twenty minutes trickled past and I pressed forward, no sound touched my
ears.


It should've been released, but the sounds of darkness in a forest only
graced my ears.


After awhile, I stopped and gazed backwards. I knew it was meaningless, but
nothing had been predictable since I found Jace Lanser at his brother's grave.
An ending scream should've been predicted, but it never came. For some reason,
that raised the hairs on my neck as I lost my footing and stumbled ahead.


It's the scariest moment in the world. Everywhere I looked, I saw blackness
and I felt the trees encircle me. They never ended.


I was alone at that moment and it was a different world. I'd survived the
streets. I'd survived Mallon, but in those woods—I held no chance.


I felt stripped, naked, and vulnerable to the everlasting power of the world.
A person can wrap subways, city buildings, roads, material goods all around them
and still die from cravings, needles, pain, or just starvation.


In that moment, I realized how the magnificent cities such as New York City,
Chicago, or Los Angeles held no weight against the constant power of mother
nature.


No matter how high a building is built or how wide a city grows, mother
nature can be relentless and unyielding. She had the power to wipe out any city,
any soul, and she'd do it without hesitation.


I felt her power in that moment and it humbled me.


Jace materialized before me and he raked knowing eyes over my stiff form. He
grabbed my elbow and turned me towards the car. He said softly in my ear, "Let's
go. I know who's on us."


I knew who he meant, but a shiver went unrepressed as his words took a
different meaning in my gut.


In that moment, I knew that mother nature, herself, was on us. She stared
down at us and her trees breathed for her.


They were her eyes and her ears. They were her fingers and she prodded us
everywhere.


"Let's go, please." I muttered.


Jace held my elbow the rest of the way until the branches lifted from our way
and allowed us to glimpse the car once again.


Jace turned the heat on as he started the car and reversed onto the road that
only his eyes could follow.


I was quiet as he concentrated on the road and on me. I caught the
surreptitious glances he cast my way until the nose of our car touched upon the
main highway and Jace turned it south.


"Did you kill him?" I asked hoarsely.


"Why?" Jace asked in return.


"Did you?"


"I'll answer you when you answer me."


I quieted and pushed it aside. He didn't warrant the reason for my question
and my pride wouldn't soften for him.


"I've seen some awful men, but I think you take the cake." I muttered as I
looked out my window.


Jace chuckled and asked, "How long were you in Mallon's bed?" My disdain
rolled off his shoulders.


"It's none of your business."


"Yes, it is, because Oscar didn't call my enemies. He called yours."


I whirled back to him and saw the truth of his words.


"Marcus wouldn't want me hurt. If they shot at me, then it was a
mistake."


"Man." Jace whistled underneath his breath. "You are pretty blind about this
guy."


"No, I'm not. I'm not proud of it, but Marcus fell in love with me."


His grin was harsh when he commented, "That's not love. It's called obsession
and I've seen it a million times. Your boy's no different."


Part of it was obsession. I had to admit it, but there were only two people
that Marcus never hurt. I was one of them.


"He doesn't hurt me." I replied, uncaring if he believed me or not. It had
ceased its importance.


I asked again, "Did you kill Oscar?"


"Why do you want to know?" Jace countered as he studied the harsh terrain
outside of our mobile cave.


"Why can't you just tell me?" I cried out, frustrated.


"Why can't you just answer my question?" Jace shook his head. "Tit for tat,
Maya. You know that."


"You don't deserve any tat for tit."


"Oh." His grin flashed. "But I'd sure like the tit."


"Where are we going?" I sighed, resolved for capitulation.


"We are going…" Jace heaved a deep breath. "I'm tired and nothing between us
has been resolved so we're going to hole up somewhere and sleep."


"You're not going to drop me off at some bus station?"


Jace shook his head. "I'm tired, Maya, and I'm not inclined for another match
of 'who can hit the hardest' so we're sleeping for now and we'll figure it out
in the morning."


"Or am I going to wake up to you gone?"


"Maybe." He chuckled good-naturedly. "But that'd be a 'snake' thing for me to
do, right?"


My jaw tightened.


"Man—I gotta give this to your buddy, Oscar, but he knew how to get you. You
don't like snakes, do you?"


"Are you admitting that you're a snake?"


"No. I think I'm a bit how you put it. I'm not a snake, but I can pretend to
be one when I need to." Jace said casually.


I shook my head. "How can you be like this? You just killed a man, went a
round with me and now…you're just…it's like nothing gets to you."


Jace laughed at that and I glimpsed genuine amusement in those smoky grays of
his.


"Or is this just a typical day in the office for you?" I asked further.


Jace quieted, glanced at me, saw that I waited and looked again. "Yeah. It
is." Jace replied with an inclining nod. "Why does that bother you?"


"How do you know it does?" I shot back.


"Oh. Here we go." He leaned back in his seat. "Another round of wills with
Maya. I have to admit, they were fun in the beginning, but right now—they're
getting old."


I didn't care. I said instead, "What penetrates you, Jace Lanser? Does
anything? Or are you just that good at compartmentalizing everything? You're a
ghost and you've got no ties anymore. How do you keep sane with that? A normal
person would've killed themselves by now."


"A ghost, huh?" Jace laughed in delight. "I like that. That's sexy."


"You lost your brother, the woman that you loved, your father…you're all
alone and you're laughing because I called you a ghost?!" I asked, somber. "How
do you live your life? How do you stay…?"


"What? Not suicidal?" Jace cast a short frown.


"Yeah."


"I'm hungry again." He shook his head in disbelief. "You're a lot of energy,
Maya."


I sat up and turned fully towards him. "Marcus Mallon is a hard man. I'm not
in denial of that fact, but he's probably the hardest man that I know—alive,
but…I've seen him crack under pressure. He would've, at least, been irritated
with me by now. But you…nothing. You just laugh."


"It's that compartmentalizing again." Jace held my gaze. "Right now, I'm just
hungering for a steak."


I wasn't exasperated. I was just confused, but I saw that my questions and
push for knowledge would be met with another harsh round of 'who can hit the
hardest'. I was still a bit dazed from the last round and everything that had
unfolded rapidly and chaotically afterwards.


I sat back and quieted.


I stared out the window, but I knew that Jace turned and watched my
side-profile for a couple heartbeats.


I finally adhered to his message. He wouldn't crack and he wouldn't allow me
inside to prod his head. I got that and I had finally, exhaustedly, reconciled
myself to a later time and place.


Oscar may have been dead, but I didn't know and I wouldn't allow him inside
my head to understand why I wanted to know.


I'd given him my ultimatum and he'd thrown his gauntlet down, but he told me
to leave. I don't know who won or if a draw had been called, but Jace was right
about one thing. I had felt a slight rumble in my stomach.


Hunger had come knocking at the door.